I’m really big on personal freedom and empowerment so it really makes me sad when I see people who say they can’t do things when in actuality they choosing to take or not take an action based on their underlying values.
Take my business for example. I am not going to lie. Being an entrepreneur does not come naturally to me. Running a business does not come naturally to me. As a matter of fact, in my world, it’s really really hard. I’ve said it before, but I have tried to quit this gig more times than I can count…and I’ve been known to say, I tried to quit but I can’t. I can’t not do what I do.
Let me ask you a question. Does saying “I can’t” in any way shape or form feel like a positive uplifting phrase? Or does it come with pain and constriction? For me, saying the words “I can’t” feels like a punch in the stomach. It hurts and leaves me breathless and feeling powerless.
So, what do I do about it? I find other ways of phrasing “I can’t” that reflect my underlying truth. Going back to my business, the reason “I can’t” quit it no matter how hard it can be to run some days is because when I’m not doing this work, my heart and soul hurt. When I’m not doing this work, I feel unfulfilled and I feel bad about myself for not stepping up for letting my “stuff” get in the way of helping the people who are asking for the help that I can give. I feel bad about myself for not stepping up and I doing what my soul came here to do.
In truth, it’s not that “I can’t” quit my business. It’s that I choose not to because the consequences of doing so hurt too much. I choose not to quit because I am choosing to honor my soul and what it came here to do. I make the choice not to quit my business because there are people in this world who need and want the help that I can give them in the way I give it.
We tend to forget that we unconsciously make certain choices because the pain of doing otherwise is unbearable which makes us feel like we have no choice. And sometimes we’ll say “I can’t” because of other people’s choices.
I remember how powerless I felt when my mom was sick and dying. I wanted to talk to the doctors. I wanted to be in on the decision-making, but I wasn’t. My mom and dad were making the decisions and choices about her care….and when you get down to it, it wasn’t my business and it wasn’t my choice to make.
So, yes, “I couldn’t” be in on the actual decision-making, but I could have made the choice to support my parents while they made really difficult and seemingly impossible choices, instead of spending my days being angry and hurt that they wouldn’t let me help in the way I wanted to help. I could have supported my parents in the way they needed and wanted to be supported. I could have responded with love and support instead of fighting with my dad because I wanted to micromanage my mother’s healthcare.
Sometimes our choices are limited….but we always have choices and when you recognize that, you will be Free and Empowered. I really do wish I knew then what I know now. I would have spent more time supporting my parents instead of fighting them. That’s where I had the power to choose. That’s where I had the power to influence my circumstances. That’s where the true power of the whole situation was.
And that’s where had I known she existed, I would have unleashed My Powerful Freaking Goddess. She’s the part of me that operates from Truth, Love, and Divinity. She’s the one who gets things done. She’s the one who would have had the strength and conviction to be supportive instead of worried about what was going to happen to me if my mother died. And she’s the one who stood up and gave me the Power and Strength I needed to continue living after my mother died.
Nowadays, I operate from this place in my being more and more every day. I am no longer willing to hide and judge her. I no longer see her as scary, overpowering, weak, or needy. She knows how to stand tall and fight for herself when necessary and she know how to step back and let things go when necessary. She knows how to protect herself and her loved ones and she also knows how to Love and nurture them and herself in order to grow. She calls bullshit on her own excuses and digs down to see what’s really holding her back….she has been unleashed and she’s no longer backing down.
I’m telling you now, if you want in, you are going to have to step up your game. I won’t accept excuses. I priced this program cheap and you are going to have to be more devoted to becoming Powerful than you are to staying stuck.
I love you, but I am unwilling to make the choice to support the shit you tell yourself that keeps you feeling powerless and victimized. Step up or don’t. It’s your choice.
Much love and abundant blessings,
